Should I be thankful or get hurt?

I remember 10 months ago, when I carried my father to the bathroom because he cannot stand on his own. His knee is swelling. I can tell that he is in pain. And seeing him like that makes me sad. Since my brothers and sister are working, I am the one who will attend the father. But the siblings do help me at night. I can’t forget the back pain I had, after carrying my father. It was never in my dream that I can carry my father to the bathroom. But I did able to carry him using the chair. The memory is still fresh in my mind, when the father told me that he is thankful that I am plus size because if not I won’t be able to carry him. Though there are possibilities since the father is very sickly as he getting old, I so wish that experienced won’t occur again.

My fear comes back because the father now is sick again. He cannot walk and stand on his own. I have to assist him to get up and eat. My goodness, the father is getting heavier. I wish the brother is here to help me, because I am having some hard time carrying the father because my back is aching. Guess the father is too heavy for me. Once again, the father is thankful of my plus size. I do not know if I should be thankful for what the father said or get hurt. Haha! Funny but it is true, because I am doing my hardest to lose weight, but seems like no effect at all to my father.